Benaiah… Reputation ResearchGood or Bad, you have one!

Hello Reader, as ‘The Emerging Man’ (photo by Gordon Parks) my goal is to capture the journey as close to when and how it happens along the way.

Today I am compiling some research for the next installment of my Benaiah series.

I have been thinking about how a person’s reputation gets built, how it precedes a person and how with the words of certain people it can either be validated and valued or torn apart and made to be viewed as trash and the person right along with it whether or not any of it is true.

I would like to share a bit of the research I have to this point and how my mind works so you can get to know me a bit and decide, if you can, by my writing what kind of a reputation you think I have.

I had to actually stop and think, “What kind of a reputation would I want to have or have others speak of me and who would those people be?”

It is strange how I worry about you, the reader, as I write. I want to be clear and truthful first and foremost and then educational and then a bit entertaining, after all I am telling a story.

I try to be a certain way but I don’t know if it comes out as intended.

I struggle with the part of having or belonging to a group of peers with the same outlook as mine because I hadn’t found any men having the same outlook about being men that I do.

I had to go and look for it.

Things such as duty, discipline and honor. When I would speak of those things I would get the cold shoulder, the dirty looks and avoided.

I thought I was the weirdo… I kinda am.

My oldest son is fond of saying, “The crooked nail gets hammered the most Davey.”

What I found was happening was that I don’t fit into ‘the world’ and it’s idea of what ‘duty, discipline and honor’ is.

So if you haven’t read your bible stay tuned, I think you’ll like where Benaiah is going.

Research… words, quotes and excerpt.

Words… reputation, refute, refer or reference (like a job reference).

“1 A good name is more desirable than great riches; to be esteemed is better than silver or gold.

^2 Rich and poor have this in common:
   The Lord is the Maker of them all.

^3 The prudent see danger and take refuge,
    but the simple keep going and pay the penalty.

^4 Humility is the fear of the Lord;
    its wages are riches and honor and life.

^5 In the paths of the wicked are snares and pitfalls,
    but those who would preserve their life stay far from them.

^6 Start children off on the way they should go,
    and even when they are old they will not turn from it.

^7 The rich rule over the poor,
    and the borrower is slave to the lender.

^8 Whoever sows injustice reaps calamity,
    and the rod they wield in fury will be broken.

^9 The generous will themselves be blessed,
    for they share their food with the poor.

^10 Drive out the mocker, and out goes strife;
    quarrels and insults are ended.

“This is why, as Jack Donovan argues in The Way of Men:

“Part of the reason that honor is a virtue rather than merely a state of affairs is that showing concern for the respect of your peers is a show of loyalty and indication of belonging…

Caring about what the men around you think of you is a show of respect, and conversely, not caring what other men think of you is a sign of disrespect.

In a survival band, it is tactically advantageous to maintain a reputation for being strong, courageous and masterful as a group.

A man who does not care for his own reputation makes his team (mine: or family) look weak by association.

Dishonor and disregard for honor are dangerous for a survival band or a fighting team (mine: like Navy Seals) because the appearance of weakness invites attack.”

~ Excerpt from Brett McKay’s aforementioned article from The Art Of Manliness.